X Roads of Michelle R Sweeny & ZETAZEN

I have two projects in the works I'm trying to complete.

It's SOMEWHAT of a MENTAL struggle trying to get them done around family, work, and my fitness schedule.

By the time I want to get to it I'm mentally drained. I figure if I want to get these things done, I need to just make the time.  However and whenever I can do it.  

Anyway, so I was doing some research last night and I discovered that my computer has speech recognition software on it...this was after I was thinking of buying the Dragon Naturally Speaking software.  My other laptop has DNS installed. Come to find out the Vista operating system already has that installed. LOL So last night I was "typing" up a storm by speaking.  I need to figure out how I can get it to work for my blog, email, Twitter, or anything else I do on my computer.  I need to get better with the commands. lol  The use of the dictation software will help me tremendously with one of my projects. So far, I found the software to be pretty accurate when dictating.  I'm pretty happy about that. 

In addition, I find it pretty wild that a couple of guys I use to date and one that says he likes me are trying to get with me. lol SAY WHAT?! Um...how bout...I'm really not interested.  I haven't even designed my man yet. HAHAHAHAHA.....

Remember to think positive thoughts. 

Love to love....

Be Free....

Here's something I made up...

"When you're on your grind, you have no time to socialize."

How cute is that? lol :-) 

I'm really on my grind right now.  I am remaining focused on completing a few goals I wrote around the end of last year. 

I realized the more I socialized the more I don't get anything done. [second person] You're too busy talking about what you're gonna do instead of doing it. 

I had mentioned this once before, how I felt being on social networking sites really didn't lend to networking but more social.  Don't get me wrong there is a benefit to them...depending on what you're using it for, you have instant contact to the masses...easier and cheaper....but if I spend a lot of time on it, what do I get done, what do I have to offer, that makes having those instant contacts to the masses worthwhile?

Just something to think about. [second person] Just something to remember when you realize a year or two has moved passed you and you don't know what you've accomplished. 

Happy Friday! Today is going to be a beautiful and wonderful day! :-) 

Be Free....

*The REAL TALK BLOG has an RSS feed to my NetworkedBlogs and my ZETAZEN Author's Page on Amazon.com  - The Real Talk Blog is also linked to Twitter through my Twitterfeed.

I can't believe I've allowed this many days to go by and not write in my trusted and most liked blog!  What have I been thinking?  Exactly! 

WHAT HAVE I BEEN THINKING?????

Well lets see here....since February 22, 2010, I've been thinking about a lot of things. 

1.  Toyota.  I own a 07 Camry Hybrid.  I LOVE THAT CAR! But I'm DISLIKING TOYOTA for the cover up a massive problem. So I thought about trading my car in....but my heart couldn't do it...so I purchased a second car instead. Now with the man in CA and his Prius (did I spell that right? lol) going crazy, my mom thinks I should just let my Hybrid go. But I love her!!!!! 

The things you love are the hardest to let go....

2. Which brings me to my next point....I'm still working on the residual feelings I'm having over my departure in my last quasi relationship. I guess I'm going through the stages of grief. First I was sad...now I'm angry. I can't think of the other stages at the moment...but I'll figure that out and post a follow up. lol What am I angry about?  Well now I feel taken advantage of. I'm working through it. I'm better than I was six weeks ago...but nevertheless it still wears on me a bit. 

and so....now I've adopted the motto.... ON 2 DA NEXT 1.....

3.  Last week there was a VERY bad car accident in front of my house....matter fact a week ago today....I wonder how she's doing.  It was a very young girl...driving a Honda Civic and a white van crashed into the side of her (I have pics and video - I will upload later - well I will try) and the MD State Trooper medi vac had to air lift her...it was so interesting to watch, but I just felt so bad for that young woman. I really hope she's okay!

Yes...her accident made me realize that I have STILL have the ability to be on to the next one....I'm pushing towards my the pictures I see in my mind a reality...and to do that....I've had to....

4. QUIT FACEBOOK! Well, not quit it quit it...but just not be on there. Once again like Twitter, I just saw myself wasting so much of time on these social networking sites and I wasn't getting anywhere with my writing career.  It is so easy for me to get side tracked...but my dreams can't afford the opportunity cost of me being on FB. (yeah there are some other reasons...of which I don't feel like explaining right now...but.....) It's all about allocating my time wisely. I'm getting engaged to the dream reality game - the DRG....that's my focus...making it happen at all cost and seeing the things I've written from my mind either flourish in an e-book (cuz y'all know traditional publishing is a loss cause) or up on the silver screen...or even straight to DVD! lol I don't care...I just wanna see my writings live on with the masses knowing about it! HOT DOG!

So yeah....that's where I am these days....making my way....it's my PERCEPTION...I'm still working on that goal.... 

Be free.... 

*The REAL TALK BLOG has an RSS feed to my NetworkedBlogs and my ZETAZEN Author's Page on Amazon.com  - The Real Talk Blog is also linked to Twitter through my Twitterfeed.

Update on Friday, March 12, 2010 at 6:20AM by Michelle R Sweeny & ZETAZEN

The stages of Grief.... 

• Denial (this isn't happening to me!)
• Anger (why is this happening to me?)
• Bargaining (I promise I'll be a better person if...)
• Depression (I don't care anymore)
• Acceptance (I'm ready for whatever comes)

Even though this is about death and dying....I look at breakups as a death of sorts...the relationship is no longer there....so......you suffer just like when someone passes on...the relationship has passed on....

Not sure if I'll go through the Bargaining stage....then again....maybe I'm already there....I thought I'd feel better when I got my second car...not just for purpose of having one because Toyota's cars having issues, but because I purchased a Mercedes-Benz....maybe I did it to boost my ego...thinking it would make me a better person.  Aaaaahhhhh......Clarity.  

I'm such a complicated person. 

I'm really coming into my own with my patience.  It has now been mastered and I feel a calmness that has come over my soul. I no longer feel like I have to rush everything or that everything must be rushed in order for it to be achieved.  It's a good feeling. I think being snowed in with the children has taught me how to just wait it out; that in due time everything will work itself out. That makes me feel good. 

Here is something I wrote as my Facebook status:

I feel it growing beneath my feet...Roots of Patience...Time is no longer my construct...I am pure untamed energy. Flowing freely. Fluid...as water adapts, so do I.

The Roots of Patience have grounded me. Here is another thought I had about importance and mirror effect of water in our lives:

H2O has the ability to transform into all three states of matter ...solid, liquid, gas - adapting - given the situation. Most of the human body is made up of water...so with that we should be able to adapt to any situation. lol Home life, Work life, Community Life...family relationships, romantic relationships, friendships....see the threes - solid, liquid, gas/home, work, community/family, spouse, friends....three states of matter or three things that matter!!! lol

Now that patience has been resolved and I'm no longer trippin' on the instant...I now have to work on perception. Things aren't always what they seem nor is my constant thinking of them is what the reality is. Wikipedia has some interesting insight to perception.  Read up on it.  

What I am receiving, thinking, and trying to understand may not always be the reality given the limited facts I have gathered through sight.  This is where assumptions are based, founded and grown.

I really have to learn now to let things go and not try to infer or spin what my perception is.  This habitual function will only keep me rooted in pain, hurt, misery and distrust of everyone around me.  Learning to accept it and not worry about it is hard.  Especially when it comes to relationships....when you want someone to love you and care about you and your perception of the situation is skewed because of what you think you see or what you think you know....and what may not be the case is detrimental to my over spiritual path. 

Perception....the new goal to accomplish. 

Transforming my thoughts for my new life.... 

Be Free

*The REAL TALK BLOG has an RSS feed to my Facebook Notes page, NetworkedBlogs and my ZETAZEN Author's Page on Amazon.com  - The Real Talk Blog is also linked to Twitter through my Twitterfeed.